Politicartoons

The Candidate's New Clothes

2008-07-03T09:24:00.000-07:00

The Change You Deserve (none)

2008-06-28T22:27:00.000-07:00

John's website.

Bad news for Obama

2008-06-21T11:13:00.000-07:00

Rachel Ray's Scarf Malfunction

2008-06-03T11:21:00.000-07:00

Please join us

2008-05-27T12:04:00.000-07:00

Please join us for a Cocktail Party to celebrate the forced end of our relationship.

Because it's okay to say New Orleans had it coming, but it's not okay to say Jewish people did.

(Because there's no way anyone from New Orleans is ever voting for the man who celebrated his birthday when their neighbors died).

I said what?!

2008-05-24T18:57:00.000-07:00

I said what?! My career is finished.

LOL!

New York Times, June 2000

2008-05-21T20:55:00.000-07:00

New York Times, June 2000:

''I would work with our friends in OPEC to convince them to open up the spigot, to increase the supply,'' Mr. Bush, the presumptive Republican candidate for president, told reporters here today. ''Use the capital that my administration will earn, with the Kuwaitis or the Saudis, and convince them to open up the spigot.''

Asked why the Clinton administration had not been able to use the power of personal persuasion, Mr. Bush said: ''The fundamental question is, 'Will I be a successful president when it comes to foreign policy?' ''

He went on to suggest, as he did in answer to other questions, that voters should simply trust him.

Poor Crazy Randy Thomasson

2008-05-16T21:51:00.000-07:00

"This is about pushing a blatant sexual agenda -- including sex changes that involve cutting off body parts -- upon impressionable schoolchildren as young as kindergarten."

"Marriage is a natural and beautiful institution between a man and a woman. It's wrong for judges and politicians to destroy marriage, which is the very foundation of society."

"You can't just tell children that they come from monkeys and to forget all about any other theory for how life began and the incredible design of the universe and the human body."

"It's not gay, it's bad."

"You need a man and a woman to have a baby. You need a man and a woman to have a marriage."

My Wish List

2008-05-06T21:41:00.000-07:00

I want the next President to get us out of Iraq. I want the President to have a pragmatic Israel/Palestine policy that will not involve blind eyes and empty buzz words. I want my next President to stop the Don't Ask Don't Tell. And I want my next President to end the losing war on drugs. And by the way, stop the war on sex, too.

I know it's a lot to ask, and I haven't even touched on economic matters. And I know you've had a tough few weeks and a tougher battle still awaits you.

So tonight, I'm not going to ask any of these things. Instead, let me just congratulate you.

But if and when you are the President, remember my wish list. Keep me in your thoughts. I know I'm just a man with a list, and I know all I can do is imagine you can hear me. But I have to believe I'm not the only one.

Sincerely,

Thank you, Mr. Bush, For Stimulating the Economy

2008-05-03T22:16:00.000-07:00

Thank you, Mr. Bush, for stimulating the economy with this money you're giving me out of the kindness of your heart. Future historians will speak of your benevolence. And... I know your plan depends on this money only visiting my account for a short time (from now until Mother's Day? Was it a coincidence that you gave me this money sooner than planned?). And I just want to say I will do that. I will not keep this money in my account for long.

But I'm afraid I will not use that money for a Mother's Day present, either.

See, I'm just an average guy. As such, my family can't make ends meet. It's simply not working. We're trying harder and end up a little lower every month. A little closer to the fall.

We bought a house, and then one day our mortgage rose by $500 a month. And no one told me a child costs so much. And the dog is still limping and might needs a surgery. And is it time to call Sallie Mae for another student loan deferment? And the small print from my bank tells me my APR will go up in a month. Just because they can.

So I don't want to sounds ungrateful. Thanks for the $600. But the Mother's Day necklace will have to wait another year.

Hey There, Indiana.

2008-04-22T22:36:00.000-07:00

Hey there, Indiana.

Now, don't be offended, but I had to look you up. Yes... I'm one of those Elitists. I'm sorry, but as far as I'm concerned, you're not a state until Sufjan Stevens dedicates an album to you.

You're looking good today, by the way.

Actually, the reason I'm here is that it's your turn soon, and I need you to vote for Obama. I'm blunt, I know, and this is unacceptable, especially on a first date. But I can't take it anymore. I can't take the games and the lies and the pandering and the bowling and the drinking and the gun holding and the stupid debates and Chris Matthews hates women, I know, but let's move on, and the ads with Osama and the singing celebrities, oh, please no more singing celebrities.

Pennsylvania messed up. No big deal. You can do better, Indiana. Indy.

How funny is it... I've only known you for half-an-hour, but I really feel a connection. Do you feel what I feel, Indiana?

1. McCain Uses His Own Push to Leave Somalia as Reason to Stay in Iraq 2. McCain is a Communist? 3. Things Look Good in Iraq (2003)

2008-04-17T20:47:00.000-07:00

"And the challenge we face is that in Somalia, we left. Beirut, we left. We can't leave. And clearly, these people study history as we do, and they think, well, inflict a few more casualties on the United States, and we'll have a Somalia or a Beirut. We've got to show our steadfastness." (2003)

“Mr. President, can anyone seriously argue that another six months of United States forces in harm’s way means the difference between peace and prosperity in Somalia and war and starvation there? Is that very dim prospect worth one more American life? No, it is not.” (1993)

"But I want to remind you, Chairman Mao said, 'First you've got to feed the stomach, then the brain.'" (2003)

"I was reminded of the words of Chairman Mao -- it’s always darkest before it’s totally black." (2008)

"And again, let's not forget things are going very well in the north and in the south." (2003)

Dear Jimmy,

2008-04-15T20:48:00.000-07:00

Dear Jimmy,

You know, you don't look so good in this picture. You look, well, old. But that's not why I'm writing you this letter. I'm writing because while you're in Israel and Palestine, over here some people criticize you. They say you shouldn't have met with the Hamas official. They say you hugged him. Did you? Did you hug the bad man?

One has to wonder why so many people get upset about two people hugging, one of whom is, well, an old man. And what's so wrong with an old man hugging someone, anyway?

And look at that--while the Israeli government ignores you and the US government criticizes you, while cycles of violence expand throughout the world and threaten to take us all with them, the man you hugged said this: "Carter asked what he can do to achieve peace between the Palestinians and Israel ... and I told him the possibility for peace is high."
Jimmy, you make me believe peace can still be achieved in my time. And that's pretty good for an old man. Good luck to us all.

And thank you.

Seriously, You're Not Helping

2008-04-12T20:05:00.000-07:00

Seriously, you're not helping. And it's getting old. And the crazy guy is going to win the elections if you don't stop.

And stop being a hypocrite. You say Obama is out of touch with the real people but your pearl necklace is worth more than I'll ever make, so who are we kidding?

I stood behind you when the Fascists attacked you and your husband because I knew their attacks were motivated by hatred and by sexism and by fear, but seriously, you're not doing yourself any favors here.

And I'm trying to be nice, really, but when you complain about Obama's comments against clinging to guns to the point that you say you hunted ducks as a child... I mean, enough already. Go home. You have a nice house and you have a lot of money. You can write another autobiography: "How I stayed in the race a little too long, but thanks Gosh I finally got out." See what I did there? It's because I know you're a big Christian.

Liar.